IT's Time

Who am I
what kind a nigga like that
when the sun outside
I wish the sky turn black
I hope the world get better
as my health gets worse
I dream about millions
while Im ridin in a hearse
Like the devil Im cursed
But  God gave me this gift
Breathing pain since birth
Aint too much that I can lift
physically,
 but mentally a nigga weak
I keep thinking its gone work
then I fall below my feet
praying someone save me
cause Im drowning in my sins
trying hard to change me
Im even frowning when I win
in the end we all perish
still a nigga still embarrassed
to do what he really feel
even if its doing nothing
but something got to give
that mean something got to take
as long as a nigga living
can he ever be fake
cause fake is something that don’t exist
make a list
get mad at the world
nigga make a fist
punch wall hit it hard
watch the blood run
keep your faith till the return
cause here His Kingdom come
whats the purpose
whats the focus
whats the end result
off into space to the stars do I catapult?
or do I fall deep down where bad souls lay
will I feel the heat a hundred trillion times the sun rays
do you picture Richard doing good for your grace
or am I a living example just another soul displaced
be a blessing what they stressing
but Im stressing for a helping
still confused about the lesson
about to grab this loaded weapon
and kill all my thoughts
seem like they hinder
don’t know my own my momma voice
nigga do you not remember
heart hard like a cinder block
so I barely let the love out
and even a smaller amount in
and that’s a damn shame
look what Im passing to my children
see dad good but only to circumstance
at a very early age graduated to a man
and still a kid inside
just waiting for both ends to collide
then what
if it was 50 years ago
would I be chillin at the end of a rope
cause now the rope virtual
you don’t just get killed now
they get you in yo pockets
how the hell you sposed to live now
and you caint die yet
you gotta suffer
seeing life through my eyes 

aint this a muthafucker

-anonymous thoughts

HE watches, I choose, HE chooses...

The things I choose,
The things I chose.
Gives me happiness,
Has given me woes.
Has made me friends,
Has made me foes,
The things I choose,
The things I chose.

The things I choose,
The things I chose.
I have sunk down,
And up I rose.
I guess, I know,
That's how life goes.
The things I choose,
The things I chose.

The things I choose, the things I chose.
Since I was born, this I did so.
I chose to breathe, I chose to grow,
I chose to read, I chose to know.
I chose to stop, I chose to go,
I chose to hide, I chose to show.
I chose to speak up, and then say no.
I chose to open my mind and then say oh!
I chose something stupid and then say doh!
I chose to be more than the average joe.
I chose to seek, I chose to find,
I chose to sleep, I chose my mind.
I chose my strength is second in line,
I chose to see when once I was blind.
I chose to cry, I chose to crawl,
I chose to try, I chose football.
I chose to stand on my own ten toes.....
The things I choose, the things I chose.

Anonymous Thoughts - RL Peterson

A Journey

when does a journey begin?

is it with the first heartbeat?

is it with the first thought?

or the first movement of feet?

is it the view of second base?

or knowing you are second best?
is it the second you feel grace?

or your second to last breath?
is it when you step into third grade?
or fail for the third time?
or the third time you get paid?
is the third time a charm a big lie?
when does a journey begin?
was is the beginning of time?
what happened inbetween?
how did I forget, the biggest essence of me?
when will I remember?
when will I become awake?
For All Thoughts Everywhere...is that the acronym of fate?
Why is there a gate?
Why have I seperated?
Why take this journey?
When I no doubt in my mind hate it?
Why ask all these questions?
Why can't I ask answers?
Why is everything backwards?
What is the matter is the question?
Is whats the matter is the answer?
Someone once asked me...when does the journey end?
From where I'm standing, the journey ends when it begins...

Anonymous Thoughts - RL Peterson

Trust

What happened to you trust?
Tell me where did you go?
Why did you have to leave so quick?
Couldn't you have left slow?
I don't know you anymore
You left when I was only a kid
I know you were with me before
But I don't know what I did.
All I did do was be born.
But wait that wasn't under my control
With you my life was warm
Now my soul seems so cold
My hands feel extra worn
My feet feel overly used
From the years months and miles
I've spent constantly chasing after you
What did I do trust?
To make you go away
Was it something I didn't do
That made you not want to stay?
I've sent buckets of tears
To where I'd thought you be now
But I guess you're not there
Cause they just keep falling down
It's been way to long
And I really want you here
Cat you see that when you're with me
I don't have not one single fear
I don't care how I put words together
Or how many times I'm wrong
I sure wish you'd had stayed forever
But I feel you are long gone.
Though I think I will someday
I will not quit on you not this time
What happened to you trust?
Why is it, for me, so hard for you to find.

Anonymous Thoughts - RPeterson

Wonder Full?

sometimes i wonder what she thinks,

i somtimes wonder what she feels

does she really see me 

and all the pain i sometimes feel

all the joy she brings if for only a moment

if only i could i would definitely own it

i wonder what goes on 

in her head upstairs

are there pictures of me

or does she picture us up there

i wonder if she sees

i wonder if she knows

every single time our eyes engage

my attraction to her overflows

and if she doesnt know

i know the reason why

if i pour out my heart

then surely i will die